Critique vs Accusation

A few days ago, I was thinking about a problem involving other people in my life.

On thinking the situation through, I concluded that I should have communicated my expectations and boundaries better with those involved.

Talking this through with two other people, I received two very different responses. One reached the same conclusion as I did and suggested that I should have communicated my expectations while acknowledging that there is shared responsibility in any situation. The other painted me to be the guilty party while absolving the others of all responsibility.

Critique is something that I can work with and is therefore valuable. Accusation, however, is imbalanced and casts unhelpful blame onto someone who may actually want to improve.

Critique me all day but miss me with those accusations.